...pint of regret...

I cherished you above all of my friends, gave my reliance and assurance that you’d do the same for me…but now? All of it seems like a big joke. I embraced you in times that I was in the dark and full of confusion but as the end of the tunnel loomed, I can see it all clear, it was all full lies. I felt stupid and deceived. All of my foundations as what really a friend should be collapsed right at my very feet.

I feel no anger but to be exact I feel a pint of regret. I lament the thought that I ever did tell you all of those things with such trust, the way I confided all my sentiments with no hesitation, the way you comforted me and the way I forgot that humans will always be humans…they can never be perfect. Coz what made them human in the first place was their imperfections. Its human nature, I couldn’t change that. It’s easy to be dumb and break other’s trust yet it is damn hard to bring it back. And to be able to trust again is the harder part.

But to lose the word “best” in bestfriend? Is the hardest of them all.

I guess having to have a best bud is really not meant for me. Trust. Above all is very important to me. I can never have a best pal if she can’t even trust me with all her problems and so as to be open to me, whether it’ll be good or bad. Coz for me? The definition of a bestfriend is like a mirror. She can see all the flaws yet see also the beauty. It is being honest vice versa and not a one way thing. It has to be true and can say all things without hesitation. Do I ask a lot? I guess I did…